Monday, December 29, 2008
Saturday, November 29, 2008
To face my Destiny
Sitting on the couch, even for a professional like me, can get a little tiresome. And by a little tiresome, I mean I almost lost my mind today. Luckily I had ONE errand to run - that's right, just one - and unluckily it was only a mere block away. The time it would kill: less than a half-hour. But, at least it's start.
The fresh air - or at least as fresh as my car smelled at the time - did me good, and after a drive to the pharmacy I decided to continue onward.
The best defense is a good offense. I needed something to fight off future boredom attacks with; something that would demand my time and effort, require patience and funding, and have the possibility of lowering my self worth and at times make me feel overall insecure. That's right, I need a date. Perfect way to fight boredom. Picking up where I left off two years ago, I drove to the last place I lined up such an arrangement... Super Target.
Okay, it might not have been a real enlightening idea, but again, it was a start. Besides, wither or not I actually believed that I would find a date at target is still up the air; I had worked their two years ago, just before I left for the full-time mission near Seattle, and it was really the only hope - for that night at least - that I had of finding some kind of familiar female face.
I'd love to see the faces of the people who drove past the window-shaking, driver-singing-and-dancing scene that was my '96 Dodge Neon on the way to Target. What can I say? Singing with the radio is a universal pick-me-up. It's a fact.
Anyway, the real point of today's blog (which happens to be the very first blog) is what I noticed once stepping into the doors of that big commercialized warehouse of trends:
Nothing had changed.
The business had continued, unflinching, since my departure, and the many faces I knew earlier had similarly gone on with their lives. Those faces were replaced by newcomers, same dreams and hopes and situation, each there only temporarily - as I was - and I guess for a moment I really felt... left behind.
Like from the movie Big Fish where time stops and then speeds up to get into place, my mission trip had been a vacation from reality - definitely not fruitless in the least, but an entirely separate reality. My world was so drastically changed by that event, yet the world it's self was unaltered. I think this is what they call existentialism, mirroring a comic I read today of Calvin and Hobbes, the blond -headed boy yelling to the stars "I'M SIGNIFICANT!" and finding no reply.
In the end, today I was inspired by boredom to face what I thought would be the next step in my life, the pathway toward the light, my very destiny, and how it that same boredom really was just setting me up for a full serving of "Get up and get going," coupled with a slap in the face by the spatula of reality. I have much to do, because the world's not going to do it for me.
God speed.
The fresh air - or at least as fresh as my car smelled at the time - did me good, and after a drive to the pharmacy I decided to continue onward.
The best defense is a good offense. I needed something to fight off future boredom attacks with; something that would demand my time and effort, require patience and funding, and have the possibility of lowering my self worth and at times make me feel overall insecure. That's right, I need a date. Perfect way to fight boredom. Picking up where I left off two years ago, I drove to the last place I lined up such an arrangement... Super Target.
Okay, it might not have been a real enlightening idea, but again, it was a start. Besides, wither or not I actually believed that I would find a date at target is still up the air; I had worked their two years ago, just before I left for the full-time mission near Seattle, and it was really the only hope - for that night at least - that I had of finding some kind of familiar female face.
I'd love to see the faces of the people who drove past the window-shaking, driver-singing-and-dancing scene that was my '96 Dodge Neon on the way to Target. What can I say? Singing with the radio is a universal pick-me-up. It's a fact.
Anyway, the real point of today's blog (which happens to be the very first blog) is what I noticed once stepping into the doors of that big commercialized warehouse of trends:
Nothing had changed.
The business had continued, unflinching, since my departure, and the many faces I knew earlier had similarly gone on with their lives. Those faces were replaced by newcomers, same dreams and hopes and situation, each there only temporarily - as I was - and I guess for a moment I really felt... left behind.
Like from the movie Big Fish where time stops and then speeds up to get into place, my mission trip had been a vacation from reality - definitely not fruitless in the least, but an entirely separate reality. My world was so drastically changed by that event, yet the world it's self was unaltered. I think this is what they call existentialism, mirroring a comic I read today of Calvin and Hobbes, the blond -headed boy yelling to the stars "I'M SIGNIFICANT!" and finding no reply.
In the end, today I was inspired by boredom to face what I thought would be the next step in my life, the pathway toward the light, my very destiny, and how it that same boredom really was just setting me up for a full serving of "Get up and get going," coupled with a slap in the face by the spatula of reality. I have much to do, because the world's not going to do it for me.
God speed.
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